disappointment

we were just having fun
rolling with the punches
so why does my heart feel out of shape —
like a fat girl doing crunches?
it’s the story of my life
I swear, I do this shit on purpose
identical scenario
you’re unavailable
I have no self-control
I fell for you and let old wounds resurface
just so I could feel something
‘cause feeling heartache is better than nothing, right?
out late last night
I paid no attention to the signs
it was dark and I couldn’t see through your lies —
but I felt them
hate these cards
even if I am the one who dealt them
just like I suspected
I woke up sober
feeling so rejected
now the morning after’s tiptoeing around
I’m stuck inside my head
I hate these thoughts
my heart’s in knots
I feel like I might drown
should I cry instead?
but it wasn’t all that serious
and really, it’s your loss
would have proven my loyalty
whatever the cost
I was in your corner
fighting hard for you
what a fuckin’ disappointment
I’m scarred because of you
I wanted it so bad
I could almost taste it
back to reality I go
it’s time for me to face it….

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Author: iekika nikole

mother.writer.stenographer.and so much more.

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